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[TR] The Rope - Washing the Filthy Bastard


slothrop

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Climb: The Rope - Washing the Filthy Bastard (10.5, 60m, FWA?)

 

Date of Climb: 3/16/2004

 

Trip Report:

I had been eyeing this line for a while, but I felt it was better saved for a bad-weather day. I knew I'd be hard-pressed to find a partner for the sufferfest I was expecting... Washing the Filthy Bastard is the kind of route everyone wants to say they've done, but I could tell it wouldn't be the most enjoyable experience. But, like the man sez, it doesn't have to be fun to be fun. I felt strong, and was mentally prepared for a solo ascent.

 

The approach was no sweat, since I'd done it countless times over the years: cross through the Kitchen, contour right, and you're there. Before I knew it, I was starting up the first pitch. At first, all was well, but then the visibility went to shit:

 

poor-vis.jpg

 

Hoping the upper pitches would be above the dark cloud that now enveloped the route, I quickly pressed on. The first section of the route is mostly a dirty squeeze, but a speedy ascent demanded use of every move I could think of, from hands to elbow-deep rattly wet jams. Some aid gear, for example an FLWM (front-loading washing machine), would have greatly eased the difficulty of the climb and saved me some time, too, but my strong sense of ethics demanded a clean free ascent.

 

Some forgettable climbing led to the mental crux of the route: The Rinse. Careful observation of the climb from the ground had led me to believe that The Rinse would only be a couple tedious pitches, but as it turns out, it was more like four or five. And what a slog! The moves were repetitive and boring, but visibility was improving markedly:

 

rinse.jpg

 

Eventually I was staring up at the summit, just minutes away. In front of me, though, was a sopping mess. I used my entire rack on this final pitch and emerged, dripping but triumphant, on top:

 

rack.jpg

 

An easy walk-off descent makes this a reasonable one-day climb. I was back at The Desk, drinking coffee and spraying away, in no time.

 

I believe I have made the first winter ascent of this route (not that anyone would want to waste their time on it in the summer).

 

Gear Notes:

Sterling rope wash

pro to 60 gallons (bathtub-size), though you can get by with one #5 bucket

plenty of water

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poor-vis.jpg

 

The Pacific Bathtub Octopus, Octropus mammutus eurekii, is most often found lurking in dimly lit bathtubs, although they are supple and have infiltrated much of the plumbing in the Pacific Northwest. When surprised or displeased they will eject a venomous brown ink as a defense. This ink is the most common source of "bathtub rings" and should only be removed by a properly trained hygienist...

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Step 1: Instead of ass say buns, like "kiss my buns" or "you're a buns hole"

Step 2: Instead of shit say poo, as in "bull poo", "poo head" and this "poo is cold"

Step 3: With bitch drop the t cuz bich is latin for generosity

Step 4: Dont say fuck any more cuz fuck is the worst word that you

can say

So just use the word mmkay!

 

the_finger.gifthe_finger.gifthe_finger.gif

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C'mon, someone say it. "Dropping coils."

 

Oh, I forgot. All the potty-mouthed spraybots are getting drunk in Banned Kamp and can't come to the computer right now. wave.gif

Slothrop, you'll have to follow up with a "Bathtub Ring TR". Those can be heinously difficult to surmount. Yet for the sake of girlfriend, SO, wife, prevail you must.
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