Jump to content
  • Announcements

    • olyclimber

      WELCOME TO THE CASCADECLIMBERS.COM FORUMS   02/03/18

      We have upgraded to new forum software as of late last year, and it makes everything here so much better!  It is now much easier to do pretty much anything, including write Trip Reports, sell gear, schedule climbing related events, and more. There is a new reputation system that allows for positive contributors to be recognized,  it is possible to tag content with identifiers, drag and drop in images, and it is much easier to embed multimedia content from Youtube, Vimeo, and more.  In all, the site is much more user friendly, bug free, and feature rich!   Whether you're a new user or a grizzled cascadeclimbers.com veteran, we think you'll love the new forums. Enjoy!
Sign in to follow this  
johnny_destiny

You Know Your Church Is A Redneck Church If.....

Recommended Posts

The finance committee refuses to provide funds for the purchase of a

chandelier because none of the members knows how to play one.

 

People ask (when they learn that Jesus fed the 5000) whether the two

fish were bass or catfish, and what bait was used to catch 'em.

 

When the pastor says, "I'd like to ask Bubba to help take up the

offering," five guys and two women stand up.

 

Opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday.

 

A member of the church requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive truck

because "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't get out of."

 

The choir is known as the "OK Chorale."

 

Boone's Farm "Tickle Pink" is the favorite wine for communion.

 

In a congregation of 500 members, there are only seven last names in the

church directory.

 

Baptism is referred to as "branding."

 

There is a special fundraiser for a new church septic tank.

 

Finding and returning lost sheep isn't just a parable.

 

High notes on the organ set the dogs on the floor to howling.

 

People think "rapture" is what you get when you lift something too

heavy.

 

The baptismal fount is a #2 galvanized washtub.

 

The choir robes were donated by and embroidered with the logo from Billy

Bob's Barbecue.

 

The collection plates are really hubcaps from a '56 Chevy.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday.

 

No joke.

 

I went to a high school in south Arkansas where we were allowed to take a day off during deer season to go hunting.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I went to a high school in rural Texas briefly where we were excused from attendance during planting/harvest.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

Sign in to follow this  

×