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Good book for all us southern boys and gals


johnny_destiny

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Just finished a great book by James Carlos Blake "Wildwood BOYS".

Oh, Im a good old rebel, that's what I am.

And for this Yankee nation I don't give a damn.

I'm glad I fought against it, I only wish we'd won.

And I don't want no pardon

for anything I've done.

 

http://www.missouridivision-scv.org/camp1743.htm

 

As my grandpappy used to say...

"Southern by birth right,

United States citizen by choice".

Edited by johnny_destiny
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Southerner are stupid.
Maybe, but at least we have exceptional grammar!

 

I prefer the more specific quote of those from the State hosting the original Capital of the U.S. : "To be a Virginian either by Birth, Marriage, Adoption or even on one's Mother's side, is an Introduction to any State in the Union, a Passport to any Foreign Country, and a Benediction from the Almighty God."

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Fuck off johnny

Dutch, it appears to me that the Great State of Alaska is the Northern Home of large number of Southerners. They give Alaska the charm and warmth of good old Southern manners and living.

Kurt, from your statement I believe you have reservations of your own academic ability to compete with a Southern Arborist

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They give Alaska the charm and warmth of good old Southern manners and living.

 

yelrotflmao.gif

 

If only the rest of the rest of you racist cowards would leave the South and go stink up another state, it'd have a chance at regaining its reputation for Be Sweet good manners. Until then, the_finger.gifthe_finger.gifthe_finger.gif

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They give Alaska the charm and warmth of good old Southern manners and living.

 

yelrotflmao.gif

 

If only the rest of the rest of you racist cowards would leave the South and go stink up another state, it'd have a chance at regaining its reputation for Be Sweet good manners. Until then, the_finger.gifthe_finger.gifthe_finger.gif

It’s too bad you are such an opinioned jerk. If you actually new any "real" Southerns (black and white) you would know that the vast majority of Southern citizens are not racist, but apparently you hold those feelings since you express them as someone else’s.

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If you actually new any "real" Southerns (black and white) you would know that the vast majority of Southern citizens are not racist, but apparently you hold those feelings since you express them as someone else’s.

 

Hey fuckwad. I was born and raised in rural North Louisiana. I know as well as you do that there are more than a few ignorant white boys, your sorry ass included, that feel it's their right to maintain race-based privilege and hide it behind any legitimizing façade they can think of. That you picked the lamest of excuses--romantic fantasies of the confederacy--indicates that you're about the stupidest bigot I've encountered since I left the South.

 

Two more things. Learn to spell, ass sucker. And make no mistake that I'm flaming your racist ass as myself, you dumb fuck.

 

bigdrink.gif

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Southern man

better keep your head

Don't forget

what your good book said

Southern change

gonna come at last

Now your crosses

are burning fast

Southern man

 

I saw cotton

and I saw black

Tall white mansions

and little shacks.

Southern man

when will you

pay them back?

I heard screamin'

and bullwhips cracking

How long? How long?

 

Southern man

better keep your head

Don't forget

what your good book said

Southern change

gonna come at last

Now your crosses

are burning fast

Southern man

 

Lily Belle,

your hair is golden brown

I've seen your black man

comin' round

Swear by God

I'm gonna cut him down!

I heard screamin'

and bullwhips cracking

How long? How long?

 

rockband.gif

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Southern Engineering Exam

 

We are sick and tired of hearing about how dumb people are in the South. We challenge any so-called smart Yankee to take this exam administered by the University of Arkansas Engineering Department:

 

1. Calculate the smallest limb diameter on a persimmon tree that will support a 10-pound possum.

 

2. Which of these cars will rust out the quickest when placed on blocks in your front yard? A '65 Ford Fairlane, a '69 Chevrolet Chevelle or a '64 Pontiac GTO.

 

3. If your uncle builds a still which operates at a capacity of 20 gallons of shine produced per hour, how many car radiators are required to condense the product?

 

4. A woodcutter has a chainsaw which operates at 2700 RPM. The density of the pine trees in the plot to be harvested is 470 per acre. The plot is 2.3 acres in size. The average tree diameter is 14 inches. How many Budweisers will be drunk before the trees are cut down?

 

5. If every old refrigerator in the state vented a charge of R-12 simultaneously, what would be the percentage decrease in the ozone layer?

 

6. A front porch is constructed of 2x8 pine on 24-inch centers with a field rock foundation. The span is 8 feet and the porch length is 16 feet. The porch floor is 1-inch rough sawn pine. When the porch collapses, how many

hound dogs will be killed?

 

7. A man owns a Tennessee house and 3.7 acres of land in a hollow with an average slope of 15%. The man has five children. Can each of his grown children place a mobile home on the man's land and still have enough property

for their electric appliances to sit out front?

 

8. A 2-ton truck is overloaded and proceeding 900 yards down a steep slope on a secondary road at 45 MPH. The brakes fail. Given average traffic conditions on secondary roads, what is the probability that it will strike a

vehicle with a muffler?

 

9. A coalmine operates a NFPA Class 1, Division 2 Hazardous Area. The mine employs 120 miners per shift. A gas warning is issued at the beginning of the 3rd shift. How many cartons of unfiltered Camels will be smoked

during the shift?

 

10. At a reduction in the gene pool variability rate of 7.5% per generation, how long will it take a town which has been bypassed by the Interstate to breed a country-western singer?

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Southern Engineering Exam

 

We are sick and tired of hearing about how dumb people are in the South. We challenge any so-called smart Yankee to take this exam administered by the University of Arkansas Engineering Department:

 

1. Calculate the smallest limb diameter on a persimmon tree that will support a 10-pound possum.

 

2. Which of these cars will rust out the quickest when placed on blocks in your front yard? A '65 Ford Fairlane, a '69 Chevrolet Chevelle or a '64 Pontiac GTO.

 

3. If your uncle builds a still which operates at a capacity of 20 gallons of shine produced per hour, how many car radiators are required to condense the product?

 

4. A woodcutter has a chainsaw which operates at 2700 RPM. The density of the pine trees in the plot to be harvested is 470 per acre. The plot is 2.3 acres in size. The average tree diameter is 14 inches. How many Budweisers will be drunk before the trees are cut down?

 

5. If every old refrigerator in the state vented a charge of R-12 simultaneously, what would be the percentage decrease in the ozone layer?

 

6. A front porch is constructed of 2x8 pine on 24-inch centers with a field rock foundation. The span is 8 feet and the porch length is 16 feet. The porch floor is 1-inch rough sawn pine. When the porch collapses, how many

hound dogs will be killed?

 

7. A man owns a Tennessee house and 3.7 acres of land in a hollow with an average slope of 15%. The man has five children. Can each of his grown children place a mobile home on the man's land and still have enough property

for their electric appliances to sit out front?

 

8. A 2-ton truck is overloaded and proceeding 900 yards down a steep slope on a secondary road at 45 MPH. The brakes fail. Given average traffic conditions on secondary roads, what is the probability that it will strike a

vehicle with a muffler?

 

9. A coalmine operates a NFPA Class 1, Division 2 Hazardous Area. The mine employs 120 miners per shift. A gas warning is issued at the beginning of the 3rd shift. How many cartons of unfiltered Camels will be smoked

during the shift?

 

10. At a reduction in the gene pool variability rate of 7.5% per generation, how long will it take a town which has been bypassed by the Interstate to breed a country-western singer?

 

HA! That looks like the engineering mechanics exam from UVA ... fruit.giffruit.giffruit.gif

 

GO VPI!!!!!

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C'mon like Washington state doesn't have backwoods hillbilly types like around the Carbon River entrance area of Rainier NP or around other areas off the beaten path.

 

It's funny how people criticize someone for being a Southerner by generalizing all of them as racist or intolerant when in fact the people criticizing are guilty of accusatory intolerance. I would suspect that differences in things such as violence per capita in the South as compared to other areas result from socioeconomic differences and historical contingency.

 

I don't really give a damn because I've met good and bad people everywhere I've gone and I basically believe people have similar motivations and aspirations (and faults) regardless of their origin or culture. The same goes for rural versus urban.

Edited by scrambler
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Arkansas State Residence Application

 

 

 

Name: ________________ (_) Billy-Bob

 

(last) (_) Billy-Joe

 

(_) Billy-Ray

 

(_) Billy-Sue

 

(_) Billy-Mae

 

(_) Billy-Jack

 

(Check appropriate box)

 

 

 

Age: ____

 

Sex: ____ M _____ F _____ N/A

 

Shoe Size: ____ Left ____ Right

 

 

 

Occupation:

 

(_)Farmer

 

(_)Mechanic

 

(_)Hair Dresser

 

(_)Unemployed

 

 

 

Spouse's Name: __________________________

 

 

 

Relationship with spouse:

 

(_) Sister

 

(_) Brother

 

(_) Aunt

 

(_) Uncle

 

(_) Cousin

 

(_) Mother

 

(_) Father

 

(_) Son

 

(_) Daughter

 

(_) Pet

 

 

 

Number of children living in household: ___

 

 

 

Number that are yours: ___

 

 

 

Mother's Name: _______________________

 

 

 

Father's Name: _______________________ (If not sure, leave blank)

 

 

 

Education: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade completed)

 

 

 

Do you (_)own or (_)rent your mobile home? (Check appropriate box)

 

 

 

___ Total number of vehicles you own

 

___ Number of vehicles that still crank

 

___ Number of vehicles in front yard

 

___ Number of vehicles in back yard

 

___ Number of vehicles on cement blocks

 

 

 

Firearms you own and where you keep them:

 

 

 

____ truck

 

____ bedroom

 

____ bathroom

 

____ kitchen

 

____ shed

 

 

 

Model and year of your pickup: _____________ 194_

 

 

 

Newspapers/magazines you subscribe to:

 

(_)The National Enquirer

 

(_)The Globe

 

(_)TV Guide

 

(_)Soap Opera Digest

 

 

 

___ Number of times you've seen a UFO

 

___ Number of times you've seen Elvis

 

___ Number of times you've seen Elvis in a UFO

 

 

 

How often do you bathe:

 

(_)Weekly

 

(_)Monthly

 

(_)Not Applicable

 

 

 

Color of teeth:

 

(_)Yellow

 

(_)Brownish-Yellow

 

(_)Brown

 

(_)Black

 

(_)N/A

 

 

 

Brand of chewing tobacco you prefer:

 

(_)Red-Man

 

 

 

How far is your home from a paved road?

 

(_)1 mile

 

(_)2 miles

 

(_)don't know

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If you actually new any "real" Southerns (black and white) you would know that the vast majority of Southern citizens are not racist, but apparently you hold those feelings since you express them as someone else’s.

 

Hey fuckwad. I was born and raised in rural North Louisiana. I know as well as you do that there are more than a few ignorant white boys, your sorry ass included, that feel it's their right to maintain race-based privilege and hide it behind any legitimizing façade they can think of. That you picked the lamest of excuses--romantic fantasies of the confederacy--indicates that you're about the stupidest bigot I've encountered since I left the South.

 

Two more things. Learn to spell, ass sucker. And make no mistake that I'm flaming your racist ass as myself, you dumb fuck.

 

bigdrink.gif

 

arlen,arlen,arlen YOU SOUND AS IF YOU HAVE SOME ISSUES. Better go draw some more forks on your family tree. hahaha

You dumb fucking bastard you actually sound like you are from LA, but looise anne will do. hahahaha moon.gif

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