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Lost: My girlfriend


layton

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Geez, I have the same problem. I take off climbing for a week with the guys, and the ex-Man at Home gets all worried.

 

What I need is someone who cooks, cleans and happily sits my dogs while I'm off climbing in Canada.

 

yup! damn it, i need a wife!

ME TOO. can I have one that doesn't bitch?? wink.gif

 

Those models were phased out after the '50's.

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The ladies love a confident man Josh...just don't slip over the line into arrogance. Besides, with all the Unabomber lookin mofos up here, I'm a virtual prince charming smirk.gif

 

Hehe...well said, I was just ribbin' ya. No shame in knowing what ya got and using it. As my buddy says...here is to being single, seeing double, and sleeping triple! bigdrink.gifbigdrink.gif

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Lost: My girlfriend

When: While I was away climbing all the time

Last Seen: Big empty space in my heart

 

No questions asked.

These are very very very very hard to come by so I won't beat the utter crap out of you.

 

(I tried to put my green electrical tape on her, but I think a ring was what would've stayed on longer. Does Metolius sell something like this, I've seen other girls with those things on).

 

Too bad, I miss her. She's saved my ass many more times than even my yellow alien has!

 

Maybe your bitch Necro will take you back. hahaha.gif

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Dear Friends,

 

It is important for men to remember that as women grow older it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as they did when they were younger. When men notice this, they should try not to yell. Let me relate how I handle the situation.

 

When I got laid off from my consulting job and took "early retirement" in March, it became necessary for Nancy to get a full-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we need. It was shortly after she started working that I noticed that she was beginning to show her age.

 

I usually get home from fishing or hunting about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says that she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts supper. I try not to yell, instead I tell her to take her

time and just wake me when she finally does get supper on the table.

 

She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. It is now not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after supper. I do what I can by reminding her several times each evening that they aren't cleaning themselves. I know she appreciates this, as it does

seem to help her get them done before she goes to bed .

 

Now that she is older she seems to get tired so much more quickly. Our washer and dryer are in the basement. Sometimes she says she just can't make another trip down those steps. I don't make a big issue of this as long as she finishes up the laundry the next evening I am willing to overlook it.

 

Not only that, but unless I need something ironed to wear to the Monday lodge meeting or to Wednesday's or Saturday's poker club or to Tuesday's or Thursday's bowling or something like that, I will tell her to wait until the next evening to do the ironing. This gives her a little more time to do some of those odds and ends things like shampooing the dog, vacuuming or dusting. Also, if I have a really good day of fishing, this allows her to gut and scale the fish at a more leisurely pace.

 

Nancy is starting to complain a little occasionally. For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. In spite of her complaining, I continue to try to offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush somuch. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any, if you know what I mean.

 

When doing simple jobs she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I try not to embarrass her when she needs these little extra rest breaks. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while . I tell her that as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me and take her break by the hammock so she can talk with me until I fall asleep .

 

I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Nancy on a daily basis. I'm not saying that the ability to show this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible. No one knows better than I do how frustrating women can become as they get older. However, guys, even if you just yell at your wife a little less often because of this article, I will consider that writing it was worthwhile.

 

Signed, Bob

 

Bob's funeral was on Saturday, April 25th.

Nancy was acquitted Monday, April 27th

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fukin funny shit.

too bad bout the lost squeeze. i lost a girlfriend round the 28th of december but was kissing another on new years eve. then i macked on the ex when i saw her yesterday. she offered me a handshake. i slapped that hand aside and went for the lip lock. no resistance was made. i got a feeling that was the last kiss i am gettin from that one tho.

evils3d.gifyelrotflmao.gif

maybe i will get another honey. maybe not. good luck with your own hunt. wave.gif

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That's outrageous! One of them would make a great gag gift except I don't have $6000 to squander.

 

I thought I had seen it all when I saw the Rice Boy page. These dolls trump those Rice Boys.

 

Boy that Rice Boy page got my thinkin' of ways to trick out the old Escort station wagon. I wonder if I can get a SHO windshield banner for it, and a contrasting color spoiler?

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That's outrageous! One of them would make a great gag gift except I don't have $6000 to squander.

 

I thought I had seen it all when I saw the Rice Boy page. These dolls trump those Rice Boys.

 

Boy that Rice Boy page got my thinkin' of ways to trick out the old Escort station wagon. I wonder if I can get a SHO windshield banner for it, and a contrasting color spoiler?

 

Polish Bob has a huge TRD sticker on his Toyota Corolla, pretty Riceboy. Then again he had a sheep drawing and someone evils3d.gif had scrawled Clownpuncher in the dirt on there too, Saturday PM yellaf.gif

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Dude:

 

There was a cute waitress at the pizza joint by the Mile-O this Saturday night. Hook up with her and your problem is solved, e.g. you'll only get to see your girlfriend when you leave town and head north to go climbing....

Aye, she WAS a cutie! smileysex5.gif

 

And all the single horny ugly ice climbers lusting after her! yelrotflmao.gif

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I caught a famous female climber checking me out...I was really tan and totally dirty, she was climbing Midnight Lightning, our eyes met...She struggled to place my face, remember me... "Who's the stud?" She thought.

The technical moves distracted her and she fell into the waiting arms of her friends...

Getting up, she scanned the crowd, but the moment had passed, and I was gone.

The years have passed and we both went on and married other people, but I know she still sometimes thinks, "Who was that guy?..."

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I caught a famous female climber checking me out...I was really tan and totally dirty, she was climbing Midnight Lightning, our eyes met...She struggled to place my face, remember me... "Who's the stud?" She thought.

The technical moves distracted her and she fell into the waiting arms of her friends...

Getting up, she scanned the crowd, but the moment had passed, and I was gone.

The years have passed and we both went on and married other people, but I know she still sometimes thinks, "Who was that guy?..."

nice memory. prolly been worth many shower time strokes eh? rolleyes.gif

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What's my secret,you ask?....it's all in the vibes.

You send out vibes to everyone you come into contact with. Women are wired to pick up this energy better than us males, as we are slow creatures.

I know how hard it is for you to talk to girls,if you need some advice...just ask.

Don't believe me? just look at my picture.

I know what you are thinking.... Who is that guy?

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