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tomcat

Do beer and feta cheese mix?

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Do beer and feta mix? By AlpenTom.

 

One day I came home and just wanted to relax. I didn't know what to do. Luckily I had just gone to Safeway earlier in the day and found this amazing new brand of Feta cheese. Me, ever the fan of feta cheese, decided to fix myself a hummus and feta pita sandwich. I often fix hummus and pita sandwiches. They are very good. I ate every tasty morsel of this scrumptious treat and forgot all about the pains of my hard day. Until.... (and this is where it really gets interesting now, so contain yourself).....

 

I began to watch TV and saw a beer commercial. I remembered how good the beer tasted the night before at the Wedgewood Ale House pub club and decided I would head for the fridge. Upon arriving at the fridge I selected my beverage of choice, a lovely 22oz. bottle of Heineken (brewed in Holland - imported by Heineken USA Inc., White Plains NY), and commenced to popping the lid in true cascadeclimber form by using a lighter and my thumb (no I don't smoke - it's my camping lighter and I just got back from camping so it happened to be in my pocket OK?). So anyway, I pop the lid and begin to drink. As I begin to peel back the foil around the mouth of the Heineken bottle (why do they put that foil on there in the first place? do they think we enjoy sinking our teeth into foil when we go to take a sip). But anyway, unfortunately, the beer did not taste right from the start. Figuring the alcohol would soon take effect and eliminate most of the horrible taste I was experiencing at that particular moment in time, I waited a few minutes to take another drink. So I waited. And those few minutes passed by until I decided it was time to try another sip. So I did. I took another sip of my Heineken and all of a sudden .. WHAM! It hit me like a ton of bricks. My stomach started tying itself in knots within seconds and I got one of those weird stomach aches that you get sometimes when you eat too much ice cream (the real crampy kind -- I even got them at a wrestling match when I was a kid for being too nervous, but that's not important now). What is important is that my stomach felt like it was producing an abnormal quantity of gas, but none of the gas could escape for some reason. It was then that I looked down at the feta cheese rapper that was still lying on the counter in front of me. And it struck me .. could this feta cheese be the culprit? Could this innocent looking, wonderfully palatable feta cheese that I had so anxiously purchased earlier in the day be interfering with my beer drinking time?

 

So I learned a couple lessons in all of this that I would like to share with you all. 1) Enjoying beer is much more important than enjoying feta cheese, and B) If you mix feta cheese and beer you could possibly produce enough gas to power your house for an entire Winter.

 

If you doubt my word and think your body is invincible to this volatile mixture -- that you will not produce gas -- and if you live in an apartment building with an old lady that lives underneath you, please do your old lady neighbor a huge favor and try it outside because you'll be embarassed to look at her in the face the next time you see her in the hallway.

 

Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to waste some of your hard earned time -- I figured I would just return the favor since you all do the same to me everytime I enter the spray forum! bigdrink.gif

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Actually you know what, and thanks for the concern catbirdseat, but the hummus I ate on that fateful day had a earthy smell. Just ask my old neighbor lady if the hallways were smelling earthy that day. No wait, she can't smell because of that operation she had, but I can tell you the only thing smelling earthy that day was the hummus. cantfocus.gif

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Tom,

 

If you love feta cheese, I've got a dip recipe for you....

 

12 oz cream cheese, softened

8 oz feta chese, crumbled

1/4 tsp marjoram

1/4 tsp basil

1/4 tsp dill

1-2 cloves of garlic

mayonaise

 

Mix together everything but the mayonaise. Next, I generally add 2 tbsp full of mayo, but some people add up to a half cup if you like it really creamy. (I prefer my dip to be a little thicker and not as soupy.)

 

Refrigerate for an hour.

 

Serve on crackers (Triscuits work best)

 

Oh yeah, and serve with gin and tonic. yelrotflmao.gif

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NEWSTIPS said:

Tom,

 

... I've got a dip recipe for you....

 

1 madgo_ron.gif Trask

 

1 beta-spewing DFA

 

1 trigger happy Greg

 

2-3 inflammatory posts

6 cups HCL.gif

plenty of bigdrink.gif

 

Mix well in an anonymous forum, and serve with the rest of us crackers.

hahaha.gifhahaha.gifhahaha.gifhahaha.gif

 

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I like your recipe PullinFool, you're a regular Betty Crocker!

 

All that has to be better than the feta and beer I had! yelrotflmao.gif

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