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Cody, WY (AP) The partially decomposed carcass of the well-known party girl and part-time hooker, Calamity Jam, was discovered by Joe and Elmira Johnstone early yesterday morning. Apparently, their golden retriever brought them a particularly grisly treat that morning - part of a severed human arm. Following their 911 call, the county sheriff promptly initiated a search of the remote reached of the canyon formed by the South Fork of the Shoshone River. Police duputies subsequently recovered the rest of the body in a remote wash leading to the ice climb known as Shank Stew. The body had been wrapped in plastic, covered in lime, and partially buried, but the torrential rains of the past week uncovered the bloated corpse. Identification was difficult due to the ravages of a hungry grizzley bear known to frequent this area, but one of the deputies had dated Jam during high school in the 1990s and recognized some distinctive birth marks on the inner thigh region.
Based on information received from an anonymous source, the police checked the www.cascadeclimbers.com website, and are now actively searching for Michael Layton, a notorious NW climber. His last known residence is listed as Bellingham, WA, but his current residence remains unknown. Police are offereing a reward for information leading to his location for questioning.
All of the residents (especially the lonely men) of Shoshone county will deeply miss Calamity Jam. A open coffin service is planned on the grounds of Bison Willy's Bunkhouse for April 1, 2005.