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nonanon

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Everything posted by nonanon

  1. That's the story. No reservations are required for small groups. Tho’ what constitutes a "large" group hasn't been very well defined. Hopefully, common sense and courtesy will prevail and no one’ll get bent when I crash their scout troop or church social. Also, there’s a larger stove in the cook hut this year, so overflow or early risers can head over there. Have fun.
  2. Long years of married life have taught me that there are only two ways to argue with a woman. Unfortunately, neither one works… Got this in the mail today: Two cars were waiting at a stoplight. The light turned green, but the man didn't notice it. A woman in the car behind him is watching traffic pass around them. The woman begins pounding on her steering wheel and yelling at the man to move. The man doesn't move. The woman is going ballistic inside her car, ranting and raving at the man, pounding on her steering wheel and dash. The light turns yellow and the woman begins to blow the car horn, flips him off, and screams profanity and curses at the man. The man, looks up, sees the yellow light and accelerates through the intersection just as the light turns red. The woman is beside herself, screaming in frustration as she misses her chance to get through the intersection. As she is still in mid-rant she hears a tap on her window and looks up into the barrel of a gun held by a very serious looking policeman. The policeman tells her to shut off her car while keeping both hands in sight. She complies, speechless at what is happening. After she shuts off the engine, the policeman orders her to exit her car with her hands up. She gets out of the car and he orders her to turn and place her hands on her car. She turns, places her hands on the car roof and quickly is cuffed and hustled into the patrol car. She is too bewildered by the chain of events to ask any questions and is driven to the police station where she is fingerprinted, photographed, searched, booked and placed in a cell. After a couple of hours, a policeman approaches the cell and opens the door for her. She is escorted back to the booking desk where the original officer is waiting with her personal effects. He hands her the bag containing her things, and says, "I'm really sorry for this mistake. But you see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping the guy off in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. Then I noticed the 'Choose Life' license plate holder, the 'What Would Jesus Do' bumper sticker, the 'Follow Me to Sunday School' bumper sticker, and the chrome plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk. So, naturally, I assumed you had stolen the car."
  3. “When I get in there you better be wearing nothing but a candy cane!” -Charlize Theron in Reindeer Games (The better Bad Santa, imo.)
  4. Denalis would be a much better match with that tosser's suit...
  5. Wired for Sound! Also, wired Packs and a Jacket (?) from Burton... Can wired Romper Suits be far off?
  6. Sure, it's fun. Fun like crack. One little taste and you're hooked. ("This snow seems sketchy, let's go ride.") Next thing ya know, you're just another Romper Suited Tosser cruising the groomiez with your pack on. "I'm really a backcountry skier. No, REALLY I am! Lookit my bindings!"
  7. Nansen's story is right up with my all time favorites. The story of two men having made a Farthest North and then taking more than a year to get back to civilization is incredible. Wintering over in a cave-like shelter made from stones. Farthest North is one of the best books I've ever read, but they were all so damn competent I wonder whether their adventure was an "epic" or not.
  8. Boot packing is lame? Nothing's more lame than riding the lifts. It ain't climbing, it ain't backcountry and it sure as hell ain't where the Freshiez roam most of the time. Fuck the resorts. It's like reading a TR from the gym.
  9. That has to be the sketchiest advice I've ever heard of from one of those columns. Pray tell what conditions would this be useful in? Dood. It was in Climbing! But if memory serves, the advisor in question was talking about a snowfield at the bottom of a route on Longs Peak, fwiw.
  10. Let me guess… Someone told that olde joke about the moyal who made a wallet out of foreskins. “And when you rub it, it turns into a suitcase!”
  11. Okay, I know you are, but are you Me??? That's what I use 'em for too. I stick them to the inside of my sled until I need 'em, which has only ever been a couple of times. A trail gets too steep and I'd rather take a pack. A few years back there was a tip in Climbing about sticking them to the bottom of your rock shoes for short snow approaches. Moon's gonna make for a great winter camping weekend this coming. Long as the clouds cooperate which they won't.
  12. I wouldn't kick her outta bed for voting Republican!
  13. Robbins was incredible in Mystic River. He’ll very likely win this year's Oscar for Best Supporting Actor. Married to that bowser Sarandon. Probably pull down a couple of million for this last movie, even more for the next one. But yeah, what a loser.
  14. Men have it sooo hard...
  15. What's with all this talk about skiing? It isn't even March yet...
  16. I worked for Karim Abdul Jabbar in the eighties. We’d talk about biking. He had a Strawberry with a top tube that came up to my shoulders. Nice guy. One morning I got to the compound in Brentwood and the only car in the courtyard was his Blazer. No security staff, no housekeepers or landscrapers or contractor’s vans, it was very odd… I rang the buzzer and waited by the gate but no one answered. I could see his car and someone was always there, so I just kept ringing. Finally, Karim comes over the intercom in a very bad mood and shouts, “Who is it?” “It’s me,” says I, “here to install your trophy shelves.” “Well you’ll have to come back tomorrow,” he moaned. I apologized but insisted on coming in as all my tools were on site and I had a truck load of shelving materials to off-load. Eventually, he caved and buzzed me in. Sometime after lunch a couple of tile setters showed up. Apparently, the Lakers had lost the NBA championships the night before. Who knew? Karim stopped talking to me after that.
  17. Ezekial??? That was Quentin Tarantino you bonehead! Dwanyer was banned because he showed us for the hypocrites we are. We love bolts, but we hate ourselves for needing them.
  18. If you’re on the way to the Wallowas and someone says “you just HAVE to try the burgers at the Lostine Tavern,” take it from me - you don’t. OTOH, passing up the chance to mow at Terminal Gravity in Enterprise would be a shame.
  19. Apparently freedom of the press is "messy" too…
  20. Hell, I am a 'Grandpa' and I've broken every part there is to break on the Voile CRBs. Any advantages of having 3-pins and cables are kinda beside the point when you break off the side of the toecup (twice) or the spring cartridge casing cracks and spits your release spring out into the snow (3 times.) I got so tired of doing field repairs I gave up on releaseables entirely. Saves on duct tape. If the question is O2s or Targas, T9s are the answer.
  21. "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD..." Ban rain.
  22. PEBCAK! Before you give up all hope, try searching your C: drive for .dbx files. And to completely establish my ignorance, what's fab?
  23. nonanon

    Bizarre Movies

    I don't think anyone's mentioned Polanski's "The Tenant." That one creeped me out for days.
  24. nonanon

    Bizarre Movies

    I thought Requiem for a Dream and Spun borrowed a lot from Drugstore Cowboy, both technically and thematically. You could throw some Salton Sea in that soup too. The more movies I see the more I like Kill Bill.
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