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About Honkeydong

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  • Occupation
    Singing and Dancing Proctologist
  • Location
    Brian Fellow's Safari Planet
  1. e-bay "rock climbing" crap

    It was a limited return because you used search instead of the site map. It's not much better, but Try this instead
  2. Climbing pants

    quote: best climbing pants ever are the stretch polyester ones you get at Value village Goodwill or Sally Ann for $2.99. This is great advice. I would add that the entire Don Knotts/3's company leisure suit can be had for a mere 5-spot. Hey, it's polyester (rather than mortiferous cotton), comes in bright colors, and best of all--looks simply smashing with a yellow pair of Koflachs.
  3. How 'bout those Mariners?

    Big Lou 2 will have his revenge on them Yanks. I hope Nellie's pitchin' the last out when we beat 'em for the AL Pennant. Oh yeah, almost forgot--Sonics in 4!!
  4. Where to go?

    quote: Maybe the Muskateers can teach me how to get over my fear of rappel and how to light a stove while on belay. Maybe these Maosketeers can teach you something.
  5. A joke, for the hell of it...

    Alright, easy there big fella. I ain't lookin' fer trouble. Just ease them pistols back into the holster. After all, I'm unarmed in this altercation.
  6. A joke, for the hell of it...

    Or you can gargle my sac. This is spray right?
  7. A joke, for the hell of it...

    Just promise me you won't tell my wife I posted it. Please.
  8. A joke, for the hell of it...

    i am a schmuck!!!! sorry ladies [ 04-16-2002, 04:54 PM: Message edited by: erik ]
  9. The Inca Trail to Machu Picchu

    quote: How did Machu Picchu remain hidden for so long? Who kept its secrets? Hmmm. I give up. Ollie North? Arthur Andersen? How 'bout Miz Clinton? Or could the remote possibility exist that those locals who knew about it all those years didn't want some punk-assed jr exec from TNF to suggest a slide show tour in the boardroom as a feeble effort to suck-ass his way to the top, consequently turning Machu Picchu into something akin to the Enchantments; replete with yellow school buses and fecal landmines?
  10. More good quotes?

    It's a long time coming, it's a long way down, it's long division, crack and divide. this is a parting, some separation, we lay in pieces, cracked to survive. i'm not your villain, not your adversary, i'm not your reason to crack and divide. it's long division, crack and divide. Shouldn't that be subtract and divide?
  11. Mark Twight Fan Club

    Action suit: I think I'll go to the Goodwill store and try to put together my own action suit. An old "disco sucks" beefy tee and a tweed sportcoat ought to do it, eh? I'll replace the GU with sloe-gin and presto! Psychological acclimatization. A pack of Lucky Strikes instead of ornithine and alpha-ketoglutarate should stimulate my anerobic threshold. I'll just have to accept that I will never strike a Twight-worthy flex pose. Oh well, that's the downside of extreme on a budget.
  12. The Mountaineers

    Big Lou............Mountaineer. Jed Clampett.......Mountaineer. Jethro Bodine......Mountaineer. Honkeydong.........Mouseketeer. Gimme an "M"....
  13. You call this jibberish SPRAY!

    Maybe this will help get things rolling: Dear: [ ] Loser [ ] Lamer [ ] AOLer [ ] Me-too-er [ ] Pervert [ ] Geek [ ] Spammer [ ] Nerd [ ] Martyr [ ] Fed [ ] Freak [ ] Scientologist [ ] Socialist [ ] Stain [ ] Anonymous You Are Being Flamed Because: [ ] Your lame advertising message has firmly convinced me to ignore you [ ] You posted a "test" in a newsgroup other than alt.test [ ] You posted an "everyone is against me/my race/my religion/my country" message [ ] You posted something asking for warez sites [ ] You quoted an ENTIRE post in your reply [ ] You continued a long, stupid thread [ ] You started an off-topic thread [ ] You posted a "YOU ALL SUCK" message [ ] You said "me too" to something [ ] You suck [ ] You brag about things that never happened [ ] Your sig/alias/server sucks [ ] You made up slang then used it in a message [ ] You posted a phone-sex ad [ ] You posted to more than four newsgroups [ ] You were imposing your religious beliefs on others [ ] You posted something really stupid/depraved [ ] You tried to blame others for your stupidity [ ] you incorrectly assumed unwarranted moral or intellectual superiority [ ] you are posting an anonymous attack To Repent, You Must: [ ] Give up your AOL account [ ] Give up your CIS account [ ] Bust up your modem with a hammer and eat it [ ] Jump into a bathtub while holding your monitor [ ] Actually post something relevant [ ] Read the FAQ [ ] Be the guest of honor in alt.flame for a month [ ] Post your tests to alt.test [ ] Print your home phone number in your adverts [ ] Slam your fingers in a desk drawer repeatedly [ ] Verify the effect of gravity by jumping from the nearest bridge In Closing, I'd Like to Say: [ ] Get a life [ ] Never post again [ ] I pity your dog [ ] Remove yourself from our presence [ ] Take your crap somewhere else [ ] Learn to post or sod off [ ] Do us all a favor and crawl into some industrial machinery [ ] See how far your tongue will fit into the electric outlet [ ] Get a clue [ ] All of the above
  14. war

    I am on the rock and then I check a stockI have to run like a fugitive to save the life I liveI'm gonna be Iron like a Lion in Zion (repeat)Iron Lion ZionI'm on the run but I ain't got no gunSee they want to be the starSo they fighting tribal warAnd they saying Iron like a Lion in ZionIron like a Lion in Zion,Iron Lion Zion I'm on the rock, (running and you running)I take a stock, (running like a fugitive)I had to run like a fugitive just to save the life I liveI'm gonna be Iron like a Lion in Zion (repeat)Iron Lion Zion, Iron Lion Zion, Iron Lion Zion Iron like a Lion in Zion, Iron like a Lion in Zion Iron like a Lion in Zion
  15. Most remote mountain in Wa

    The farthest one from my house. No seriously, kinda odd place to post this in the gear critic, eh? You can look for yourself here,but it may take awhile.