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chris_stolz

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About chris_stolz

  • Birthday 11/30/1999

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    gumbiesoncrack.blogspot.com
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    brain gardener

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  1. It's Aug 8-- any updates from ppl in area? Also I found frimer's excellent topo for Crossover Pass descent. Can anyone who's done it comment-- easy to find, scary, etc etc? I've done NE Buttress but we descended the regular way to west of mtn.
  2. It is a really cool route. I am psyched that we were able to do it quickly and that we had great weather (read: we didn't need to bring a ton of stuff). The grigri-and-tiblocks system is awesome for the easier stuff-- fast, and safer than standard simuling. next proj would be to try and do it in one day...
  3. Trip: Stuart N Ridge-- Falstaff's version - Mt Stuart North Ridge Direct Date: 7/29/2014 Trip Report: I am God, and, despite being God and therefore omniscient and omnipresent, I sometimes choose to climb in a mortal body, assuming the same risks the lesser do, as a gift to The Human Race. I originally planned to nude freesolo-- in my Ryan Gosling incarnation-- the North Ridge of Stuart but decided that Alex Honnold, who has been experiencing considerable success at the freesoloing game, would be shown up by my exploits. Indeed, as Henrik and I texted back and forth pre-trip, I thought back to that summer of 2006 in Yosemite, where Honnold asked me "what should I freesolo?" and I responded with "everything, son, everything" and for once a mere mortal obeyed God. As Henrik and I drove through the northwestern U.S., with its McDonalds filled with people as fatty as the products there served, I hoped my partner would be able to keep up with my lean musculature, near-perfect route-finding skills (I had turned off the "omniscient" function on my Godly iBrain but still had the navigational chops of a medieval Maori sea-traveler), immense speed etc etc. We arrived at the trailhead at 1:44 PM and and at 1:45 were approaching. The dogs and women I passed shirtless on the trail drooled over me and the men cast nasty glances my way as their marriages crumbled as women fantasised about a life more perfect. We chose to arrive at the base of the North Ridge in 5 hours rather than the book's recommended 6 and there I prepared a 12-course meal using only one burner, 3 pots and one of those micro-thingies of gas. So delicious were the smells of my cooking that the couple who had foolishly decided to start the north Ridge and bivvie on it-- mortals always underestimate the benefits of sleep-- began fighting. Not only was my cooking better than the granola bars and Safeway peperoni that the poor ridge-bivviers were stuck with, but shirtless me cooking distracted the female of the party. The next morning after making a seven course breakfast in only twenty minutes-- along with triple macciatos-- Henrik and I saddled up and began our ascent. I deigned to lead the first two pitches and then Henrik did an amazing job-- for a human-- on the third, 5.9, pitch. After this our need for speed overwhelmed us and we moved to the simulclimbing system which I had invented before letting Dean Potter and his ilk use it int he '90s in Yosemite. We sprinted up the route, passing a wussy-assed group of four who had the entire contents of the climbing section of R.E.I. on their racks, and arrived at the Gendarme. At the Gendarme were a party of three and another of two-- hauling packs up the dreaded approach to the dreaded 5.9 wider pitch-- and we didn't want to ruin people's self-esteem by climbing over them faster, more smoothly, with less gear, with better form, while wearing our packs, smoking, chatting, checking our Facebook and doing other awesome things. So we graciously took the bypass and arrived on the summit a mere 6 hours after beginning the ridge. We would have climbed faster but it is always necessary to allow other to believe they have what are now referred to as Mad Skillz Yo so we kept the speed down but nevertheless enjoyed a human-free summit with magnificent views of my Creation, nevertheless passing a grand total of 11 people on the route. The descent through the Cascadian was what traveling through anything God made would be: blissful. Indeed, I wondered briefly why one would climb the north Ridge when so amazing a walk as the Cascadian, with its perfectly-formed scree and bread-baking temperatures, not to mention opportunities for establishing new trails or scouting out myriad old ones, was available. I brewed perfect espresso with exactly the right amount of crema at the creek and we strolled like English gentlemen having just shot braces of partridge over Long's Pass and back to my Maserati, where ice-cold, locally-sourced, organic, free-range, GHG-neutral craft beer awaited.
  4. Trip: Stuart direct-- the "clean" TR - Mt Stuart north ridge direct Date: 7/29/2014 Trip Report: OK I posted this in the wrong forum with either too much or too little trash talk so I'll post a non-trash-talk one just for facts and less fun. Henrik Hinkala and I set out from trailhead Sat at 1:45 and at 6:45 were at base of north Ridge. We bivvied comfortably and awoke at 4:30 A.M. and at 6 I was linking P1 and P2. Henrik led P3 (5.9) and then we switched to simuling on gri-gri and tiblocks. After 3.5 hours we had passed a group of 4 and we were at the Gendarme. Because we were in a rush and had to go back to Canada we didn't want to wait for a party of 2 and another of 3 to do the Gendarme so we rapped and bypassed via a wee bit of snow. We arrived on the summit 6 hours after starting the ridge. The descent was, go around S/SW side of false summit following cairns past bivvy spots, head down a snowfield then sharp skier's right into top of (broad) Cascadian. Then skier's right again through scrub pine and down to the creek. We had coffee then walked over Long's Pass. Total time 20 hrs over 2 days. Would have been faster with one more tiblock (longer simul pitches). Gear Notes: rack: camalots .3-#4, 2 link cams, 1 grigri, 3 tiblocks (4 better), 2 draws, 6 short slings, 4 looong slings, a few nuts, light glacier axe. 3 litres of H2O; water at top of cascadian Approach Notes: For the CNR, stay below glacier and on or above snowfields after Goat Pass. For the shorter version go across glacier into gully. Maybe crampons for this glacier crossing i dunno
  5. I should have totally upped the shit-talk factor when I posted this. It should have been WAY more outrageous. Because I made it slightly serious (or slightly outrageous depending on your PofV) it gets misinterpreted. So I am gonna post a serious one in the right forum (not north cascades).
  6. LOL ya a friend did the ridge in under 3 hrs hers is the record to beat
  7. Ya true I didn't bother figuring it out. Sorry man.
  8. Duh. Obvs. I've taught everyone from Reinhold Messner to Steve House to Alex Honnold and even my dog how to climb. It is only natural that I do everything faster, lighter, harder, in better style, with better make up on, under tougher conditions, etc, than anyone else.
  9. For me, climbing a couple thousand feet of easy stuff and skipping the 2 good pitches would feel that way. No accounting for personal taste... True but prob was, you wait 2 hrs and you gotta be at work Monday in Canada, no time to waste. I have a return engagement.
  10. thanks ppl. Trip report now up. Next time I wanna do it car to car in 1 day.
  11. Trip: Mt Stuart - Direct North Ridge Date: 7/26/2014 Trip Report: Henrik and I found the first crux of Stuart to be not stopping at all the yummy Mmerican Mcdonalds with their extra-sweet ketchup on our Saturday drive down to Stuart. We hiked in via Ingalls Lake to the base of North Ridge past several hundred dogs and some Americans slightly less fat than most of their countrymen and were in about 6 hours at the base of the North Ridge. Our rack: 8 camalots .3-#4, 2 link cams, a few nuts, 3 tiblocks w/ lockers, 1 grigri, 2 draws, 7 short slings, 4 long slings Approach beta: for the shortened north ridge, stay high on the glacier after Goat Pass (you might want crampons-- it's steep) then traverse into that awful gully that accesses ridge. For CNR, stay below glacier on snowfields and talus. Why would anyone do the abbreviated version? That would be like looking at a cake but not being allowed to eat any of the icing. After a spectacular sunset and hearing a couple on about p4 debate which shitty slanting waterless bivvy spot to use, we slept and awoke at 4:30 and after pork sausage and cowboy coffee I was placing gear at 6 a.m. We linked the first two 5.7 pitches then Hinkie led the 5.9, after which we busted out the gri-gri and the tiblocks and started simuling. We rocketed up perfect granite. The usual high ridge beta is key: stay on the very edge for nicest moves and best views and exposure. We passed a party of four who were on their 3rd day on the ridge. They had an astonishing number of ropes and were moving glacially. At the gendarme were three parties including one three-person group, all of whom said "yes we will be hauling our packs" so we bolted for the bypass which featured a rappel and then me leading out a few snowy moves before back into perfect white granite. As Henrik belayed me out the party of four decided also to bypass and as the older dude in that party rapped down, he slipped and flipped upside down due to his mega pack and started to slide along his rope, barely catching himself before he hit the rock shelf. USE A FRIKKIN' PRUSSIK WHEN RAPPING IN ALPINE, ppl! After about 200 meters of simuling in front of me appeared a guy who stood in a sandy alcove, adn was clipped to an anchor, and this dude was hallucinating. He was talking to himself. "Take, take, take" then I realised he had a radio. Oh f*ck I thought, the clearest sign of idiocy in the mountains is the carrying of a radio. I mean you're pitching the route out in perfect sunny windless weather, I KNOW you checked the forecast cos you also have one of those tv-sized smartphones, and you still need a radio? Did God cancel your voice for this climb? Anyways after Radio Man started up and knocked some rocks onto us we headed left and arrived at summit. 6 hours. If there hadn't been clusterf*ck at gendarme and Hinrik getting off route for a bit and me being too much of a pussy to get a few nuts out (and one more tiblock) I bet we could have done it in 4. The descent-- follow cairns around SW side of false summit, down small steep snowfield,, then head right into upper Cascadian then right again through dwarf pines into lower Cascadian-- took about three rock-filled-boot hours. I was VERY glad to have short glacier axes. We brewed coffee at the creek and waited for the sun to disappear from the Longs Pass trail then had a lovely walk back to car. OK some notes on Da Biz: -- ppl who wanted to "go light" and slept in a bivvy sack without a sleeping bag screwed themselves. If you are freezing and miserable, the lack of sleep will slow you WAY more than an extra pound of sleeping bag will. -- I brought 3 litres and that was about right. Water available below false summit. North Ridge mid-summer is in sun all day = HOT -- Doing it in 2 days? The best way is what we did: sleep at base of North Ridge. There is water, flat wide bivvy spots, and it's warmer. You get a better sleep & more hydration, then you can blast the route in 1 day (assuming you are fast). If you slept on ridge would be colder, less water, less comfy bivvies etc. -- I would bring fewer nuts and 4 tiblocks and a lighter rope for simuling. The system really does work amazingly well. -- Technology is f*ckin' stoopid. You do NOt need a sat pphone, GPS, smartphone, radio, altimeter, etc. Go to the base, climb the route, keep your eyes open. Here are some pics if google docs will let me post these. First me on the ridge [img:center]https://drive.google.com/folderview?id=0B0ojBPr6OiMSeWdmaENjM2I3c0U&usp=sharing_eil'>https://drive.google.com/folderview?id=0B0ojBPr6OiMSeWdmaENjM2I3c0U&usp=sharing_eil[/img] Us on summit https://drive.google.com/folderview?id=0B0ojBPr6OiMSeWdmaENjM2I3c0U&usp=sharing_eil
  12. thanks for the advice. we're gonna go in from south, camp at base of route sat eve then do it Sun. We have a single rack to 4" and nuts and will simul on Tblocks and grigri anything below 5.9 is that trail that goes off the bottom of cascadian and up to Long's easy to find? ANyone have suggestions about where it is or do ya just gotta hunt?
  13. Hey all-- hoping to do a car-to-car in 1 day Sunday of Stuart Direct N Ridge. Will simul (grigri and blocks) anything 5.8 and under. Wondering 3 things a) how long a walk from Car via Ingalls lake to base of N ridge? b) if anyone has done it this year, is last water on route at base of N ridge or is there snow higher up? c) If one approached from the north, how long from car to base of N Ridge? Any help appreciated. Chris
  14. How long does it take to get from the car via the Ingalls pass etc to base of direct north ridge? We're planning on simuling (grigri and t-blocks) everything 5.8 and under and wondering if car to car in 1 day would be do-able. chris
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